A breakup hurts more intensely that words can describe and it might often seem to be impossible for you to even begin to leave the hurt and bitterness behind and move on with life. In fact, memories haunt you all around, and everywhere you go, there’s a memory that follows you. Well, getting over a breakup is hard, but it is possible. If you have been through a breakup, the following points will help you find out how you can get over it and move on with your life.
Accept That It’s Over
This is the first thing that you need to do. Many people tend to live in denial and sit around hoping that it was all just a bad misunderstanding and that you will get your love back. Well, there are some circumstances in which you can make use of ways to get your love back. However, in most cases, it would be wiser to accept that it is over. Acceptance is the first step to healing.
Have A Good Cry
A breakup has often been referred to as a “mini death” since the pain and trauma that a person goes through during a breakup is indescribable. Well, there’s nothing wrong in having a good cry. Tears have a healing effect on emotions.
Crying tends to give your emotions an outlet and speeds up the healing process. Some people tend to bottle up their emotions and put on a brave face. This does not help in the long run, and people who do that find that, even after years have passed, they haven’t really gotten over their breakup.
Take Care Of Things That Invoke Memories
There will be a lot of things around you that would invoke memories of your loved one. These could include letters, gifts and photographs, apart from other memories of togetherness. Put these away, probably in a box, and put them in the farthest part of your closet or attic for the moment.
While you might feel that it is better to destroy all of these memories immediately, it does not always help. At times, the actual act of destroying things that are precious to you can hinder the healing process. Therefore, keep them away until a point of time where you can handle them.
Allow Yourself Time To Heal
Keep in mind that the healing process takes time. It might take you weeks, months or even years to be able to get over the devastation you presently feel. This is completely normal and natural. Do not push yourself to feel better. While it is good to push yourself to make efforts, give yourself some time to heal.
Do Not Prolong Anger And Hatred
While it is natural to feel angry with the other person, prolonging hatred leads to more hurt. There is a popular quotation that says “Anger causes more harm where it is stored than where it is poured”. Let go of resentment for your own sake. Resentment, anger and hatred will not get you back your love, nor will it stop the other person from moving on with their life. It will only hinder your progress.
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Talk To Friends
Talking to trusted friends about your feelings will help you heal yourself. Expressing your feelings is a way of dealing with your emotions and finding relief. In most cases, your trusted friends will be able to help you further in getting over the breakup.
Write Down Your Feelings
If you feel uncomfortable talking to a friend, write down your feelings. Writing your feelings down will ease your pain quite a lot. At times, seeing your feelings take shape in the form of words is a vital part of the healing process. Some people maintain a log or a diary of their progress in their efforts to get over the breakup. Doing something similar might help you.
Take A Holiday
A holiday or a change of scenery can help you get over a breakup. In many cases, being away from familiar places and people will hasten the healing process to a large extent. Therefore, plan a short holiday, preferable one in which you will not be isolated, and enjoy yourself.
Get A New Hobby
Get a new hobby and try to be busy with it. You can probably try your hand at cooking or gardening. A breakup will make you feel worthless and unwanted. When you have a hobby, though, these feelings are subtly reversed. When you cook a delicious meal or when you see your garden with beautiful flowers, the joy and satisfaction you get will help you keep moving on.
Join A Gym
Staying fit can ease a lot of pain. When you work out at a gym, you will find that a number of negative feelings are countered. Working out releases endorphins, which are natural chemicals produced by your body to fight stress. Therefore, working out can help ease the pain of a breakup to a large extent.
Get A Makeover
Getting a makeover can boost your self confidence to a large extent, and this is especially vital after a breakup. Getting a new look will help you feel better and more attractive. A breakup would have shattered your self esteem and made you feel ugly, worthless and unwanted. Getting a fresh look and will make you feel better in no time. This is a step that needs to be taken, not to attract someone on the rebound, but it is something that you should do for yourself. You deserve it.
Although it might seem difficult, always try to stay positive. Just because this particular relationship didn’t work out does not mean that all relationships are going to fail or that you are not good enough. Staying positive will help you focus on the better things in life and move on.