Dealing with a Friend’s Death

If a close friend passes away, it can be one of the most traumatic experiences and a loss that is close to irreparable. It takes a lot of will power and inner strength to deal with the situation.

However, here are some tips to help you cope with the occurrence of such an event:

The first thing that you need to do is to accept the fact that the friend is no more. It is a hurtful acceptance, yet the earlier you do it, the easier it becomes for you to get over the loss. We are conditioned to deny things that are not pleasant and there are many ways the brain tries to defy these situations. For example, if you turned and saw that there is a Frisbee about to hit you, what will your instinctive reaction be? A study indicates that the first response of a subject when he/she saw a pillow being thrown at him/her was to close the eyes. Mostly we try to avoid an unexpected event and this is an instinctive reaction. Thus the sooner you accept the fact, the easier it will be to get over it.

Find time and things to do by yourself. There would have been time in the week or the month when you would have spent with your friend. Ensure that time is filled with some constructive activity that keeps you busy. If you will not get involved in any activity on these occasions, the memory of your friend and the things you did together would keep coming back to you and the experience will be considerably distressing.

One of the most formidable challenges is to fill the gap of a friend who was persistently there for you. Whenever you would come across situations where you would have talked to him/her, it would be painful. Therefore you must grasp and include the idea that the gap created in the absence needs to be filled and there will be others who will understand you the way your friend would have had. So reach out to other people close to you. Do creative work or community service. These will help you as well.