A relationship is certainly one of the most beautiful aspects of one’s life. It can be a very fulfilling and memorable experience in the initial stages, when both the partners witness the world and their love story through rose tinted glasses. However, the lala mode is unfortunately, only a temporary phenomenon.
Sooner or later, the complexities of commitment are bound to catch up with hunky dory romances and that is when the downward spiraling of the relationship begins. Although this is certainly not inevitable, but such is generally the case – almost every relationship does face problems and hurdles that must be sidelined in order to ensure a successful future for it.
What do you do when a relationship on which you have laid so much of trust, starts to falter? How do you cope with the situation when your perfectly crafted bubble of romance begins to burst? What can be done when that one relationship on which you invested tremendous time and emotional effort begins to fall apart?
Healing a relationship is not a simple task. It takes a lot of perseverance, hard work, patience and optimism. Here are a set of guidelines that will help you survive tough times and revert to them positively, should you face such situations –
Tips on Healing a Relationship
Ascertain the Life of the Relationship
One of the most important steps that you must take when you come across such a situation – is being farsighted and determining whether there actually is hope for revival of the relationship, or not. What happens very often is that you start working on the resurrection of your relationship with misguided optimism, whereas in reality, the incompatibilities are so huge that it is practically impossible for the relationship to have any sort of a future permanently.
In such a case, people tend to simply keep on stretching the rope until it breaks, which is again, a very emotionally exhausting process. Hence, before you begin the process of healing a relationship, you must determine whether that can yield any good in the long run or not. Rationally think over the issues that you have been facing, and decide intelligibly whether these issues can be resolved or not.
If you feel there is hope, even though the state of things may be terrible currently, put your heart and soul into healing the relationship and be ready to face whatever outcomes may result from your efforts. On the contrary, if you feel that the differences are too strong and too deeply founded to be reconciled, even if the state of the things may not be that bad presently, you must take the tough decision and break up in order to avoid further emotional anxieties and trauma.
Hope is the key to healing the relationship. Once you have made up your mind that you want the relationship to work out, you must make a conscious effort to sustain your optimism and positivity. Do not let yourself succumb to the bouts of depression and hopelessness that are bound to happen from time to time.
Be strong and have confidence in yourself and your efforts. Never let yourself believe that things are not going to work out the way you want them to, because that is bound to lower your morale and make your efforts half hearted. Be optimistic in your approach and you are bound to witness positive results eventually.
Communicate Unhesitantly With Your Partner
One of the major reasons why modern day relationships flounder ever so often, is because of the communication issues that are ingrained firmly in our social media savvy culture. Lack of free flowing communication and sharing of issues and problems between the partners can be the absolute undoing of an erstwhile healthy relationship.
The problem these days is that people tend to substitute real life communication with virtual networking. However, it is essential to note that the two are certainly not equivalent. While virtual communication via Facebook, messaging, chatting etc is more convenient, personal or face to face communication involves not only an exchange of information, but also of emotions. The subtleties of real life communication make it impossible for it to be dispensed with.
Hence, make it a point to discuss the issues that have been hampering your relationship with your partner, in as calm and unbiased a manner as possible. Talk to them unhesitantly and freely, without holding anything back. Pour your heart out and the full transparency of emotions between the two of you is bound to work wonders for your ailing relationship.
Be Open to Change
Once the issues have been discussed and dissected, it is time for taking action on the same. It is obviously not enough to simply list out the reasons why things aren’t working out – you have to also come up with solutions to make things work out! Change is the key term here.
If there are some aspects of your personality, or some habits, some odd peculiarities, that bother your partner, convince him/her that you will do your best to change them and then, make sure you do give it your best shot. Similarly, your partner should put in equivalent effort to change the things that bother you about them.
Do not be stubborn in this respect. A bit of mutual compromise can do a lot of good to the relationship. Do not let your ego overpower you at this crucial juncture. Be open to change if you feel that doing so will make the relationship work. At the same time, do not turn into a complete doormat and persist on changing things about yourself when your partner is completely uninterested in reverting in a similar fashion. Remember that you need two to tango. Your individual effort will be a futile waste if your partner does not reciprocate and respond positively to them.
Follow the above tips with dedication and half the work of healing a relationship is done. The rest shall fall into place when you follow your heart and your deepest instincts with passion and reinforce your belief in the power of your love for your partner. Always remember, if you truly love a person, the healing will reap results and if it does not, then that was meant to be and should be accepted without much grief.