“I need space”. This is a common, dreaded phrase that many women hear, and then go mad wondering what they did in order to have their man pull away from them in this way.
They try to beg, weep, get hysterical and play the whole blame game, just to push their men away from them even much more. They wonder what went wrong and, most often become disillusioned with themselves and their relationships. If you are trying to strike a balance in your relationship, take time check on the health of your bond with your man, periodically. Learning the signs that your boyfriend needs more space will help you prevent a breakup and will save both of you a great deal of heartache.
Remember that even a plant needs its space and the right environment in order to thrive and grow well. A relationship is like a plant – apart from watering it well, you need to also give it the space it needs in order to blossom. Giving your guy the space he needs after analysing the following signs, will actually help him appreciate you more, and will help you draw closer to each other.
He Prefers To Hang Out With His Friends
Your man might be extremely busy and might get limited time off from work. You would, obviously, like him to spend time with you in the time available to him. Instead, he prefers to hang out with his friends, telling you that he needs a little “guy time to chill out”.
Or, he just might be out with other friends each time you call him. This is a warning sign that all is not well in your relationship. If your man was completely comfortable with you, then he would take every chance he gets to come running into your arms.
He Delays Plans Or Is Unavailable All The Time
Both of you have probably decided that you need to spend some time out together. However, your boyfriend continues to delay plans and postpone them. The most common excuse for this is his work schedule or family obligations. However, if he seems less than enthusiastic about working towards plans that you have already made together, then this could be a sign that he needs space.
Have you found yourself trying to make plans for you and your boyfriend, only to find out that he is always busy? Has he been making excuses to spend time with you or to do things for you? This could be a sign that he needs space and he needs time to really get back the core emotions of your relationship. When a man needs space, he usually withdraws from things that he might have enjoyed before, and you just might find yourself pushing him further and further away the more you try to fix things.
He Does Not Take The Initiative
If you find that you need to take the initiative to plan all your dates and if your man just seems to go with the tide as you plan, then it is time for you accept the fact that he might be getting tired of the relationship. At this point, even your efforts to be with your man might make him feel like you are invading his space. Therefore, step back for a while and take things slow.
This also applies to text messages and calls. If you find that you are the only one who takes the initiative to call him or send him text messages, then this is another sign that he needs space. Or, you might find that you keep calling him and sending him text messages or e-mails, which are rarely, if ever, responded to. Stop at this point, and do not smother him with excessive contact. There are times where expressing too much love all at the same point of time, can cause relationship problems.
He Is Argumentative And Critical
“When love is thin, faults are many”. This is a common quotation. There might not be any major changes in your attitude or behaviour. However, you might find that small things have begun to upset your man. Or, things that he liked earlier are exactly those that he hates now. He gets irritated with minor things and his demeanour changes drastically toward you.
Small disagreements get blown out of proportion and end up being full-fledged arguments. He is also critical of your best efforts, and very few things you do seem to please him. Nothing seems good enough when you do it. However, if someone else does a worse job, he seems appreciative of their efforts, even if the end result did not please him. This is a big sign that you are heading to a point where your man is going to ask you for space.
After considering the above points, if you feel that your boyfriend needs space, then take the initiative to step back and introspect as to whether you are being too clingy or whether you are smothering him. Do not wait for him to say the dreaded words “I need space”.
Give him the space he needs before he asks you for it. He will appreciate and love you a great deal more for doing so. Giving your boyfriend space does not need to involve a lengthy debate with him as to his emotional withdrawal. You can say a lot more by your actions than you can with words. Take time out to have a social life of your own.
Do not flirt with other men in order to get his attention. Give your man time to take the initiative to get in touch with you or plan dates. In the case of some couples, a few days of space will get things back on track. In the case of others, though, it might take a few weeks or even months for your man to want to draw closer to you. If you truly want to save your relationship, give your relationship the time and space it needs in order to thrive.