Any human being yearns for a wholesome relationship. There are many who are able to find that someone special with whom they can spend their entire lives. However, more often than not, these relationships tend to become a burden to both or either of the parties involved.
When such becomes the case, it is no use carrying the burden of a dead relationship on your shoulders. Everyone dreads having to break up because everyone wants that their relationship works out. Nevertheless, if it is not meant to be then there is no point in dragging the relationship along, with no love or concern involved.
You can see a break up in a different light. You can see break up as a means of freeing yourself, as well as the other person, to find someone who really is the one with whom they would like to spend their lives. This gives a more positive perspective of a break up.
Most women dread breaking up. The emotional creatures they are, they fear they might hurt the boyfriend if they tell him that he is not the one for them. So very often, they tend to leave without even breaking up. However, if the relationship has to end, then you should at least inform your boyfriend about it.
Before you break up be sure that you want it this way. Do not make a hasty decision. Relax and cool down before you make this decision. Take a look at your relationship. How far have you come and what have you done to save it? If you think you have done enough and can do more then breaking up might be the right direction for you. Just be very clear in this because you will be affecting two lives here. So make a decision that you will not regret later on.
Is A Break Up Letter A Good Idea?
Most experts say that it is not a good idea to break up over the phone, by email or by a letter. You need to break up in person. Breaking up is a very emotional thing to do. When you do it in person then you might stray from what you actually wanted to say and end up saying and doing something that you will regret later on. So the best thing to do is to write a letter and then go in person to give it to your boyfriend. Be with him when he reads the letter. This way the letter will be helpful in steering your conversation.
The Break Up Letter
Now that you have decided to write a letter, there are few things that you should keep in mind.
Be Straightforward, Not Rude
Say what you have to say. Nevertheless, you do not need to be rude when you do it. Remember that you once loved this man. Be honest but say it politely. Speak about the problems.
Here you do not have to get all emotional and start blaming your boyfriend. You do not need to write your boyfriend’s faults, rather discuss what went wrong and why you can no longer stay in this relationship.
Stay away from insulting or abusing your boyfriend verbally. You do not want to end this relationship on a bitter note.
There is no need to use harsh words like “I can’t take it anymore.” Instead be gentle and use words like “we should rethink what we want of each other and this relationship.”
Avoid sounding like you are dumping him. Let him also understand that staying apart is in the best interest for both of you.
Do Not Give Hints
If you are very strong about your decision, try to avoid giving him any hints that might lead him to believe that you are ready to work on your relationship.
Remember To Thank Him
Do not forget that you spent some of your life’s best time with this person. So thank him for all the wonderful moments you spent with him.